A Curse Or A Blessing
by HeavenlyKitten
Summary: When Arthur and his knights have to defend a convent from the saxons him and Lancelot discover they have more in common than just fighting together. Her name is Bryony.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:**_ I thought I'd try my hand at writing some King Arthur fanfic let me know what you think. I've written one other, but this is my first one I've posted here._

_**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or thing in King Arthur**_

**A Curse Or A Blessing**

"Bloody hell." soft lips swore as the sound of swords clanging together resounded through the empty halls of the small convent.

"Bryony!" a loud scream broke through the sword fighting.

"Katlyn I'm coming!" Bryony yelled as she ran as fast as her tiny feet could take her.

When Bryony reached the main hall where the sword fighting was taking place she paused just in the doorway. That was a mistake. A filthy hand reached out grabbing a handful of her hair as the man it belonged to dragged her backwards down the hall. She tried to fight, but she couldn't fight him off. She cried out as he grip on her hair increased. When he slung her into a near by room she got a clear look at his face. _Saxons. _Her mind screamed at her to run, but her feet would not move.

"Well, lucky for you we don't mix our blood." the man sneered as he walked toward her with his sword drawn." It does not mean we do not kill."

"Stay away from me you filthy swine." Bryony shouted as her hand reached out to a sword.

"You women are all the same." the man stepped closer as he raised his sword" Filthy dirty whores." he swung his sword, but instead of it connecting with soft flesh it connected with the sword Bryony swung out." Ah, a little fighter we hav."

They fought hard each trying to get the upper hand finally Bryony did as she sunk her sword into the man's chest. She barely had time to let it register what she did before she heard Katlyn's scream again. She pulled the sword from the man's body as she ran toward the main hall again. She saw men there that were trying to protect Katlyn and Beatrice. Her eyes then fell on two familiar faces and relief washed over her.

"Katlyn I'm here." Bryony yelled as she fought her way to the younger girl.

As Bryony made her way to Katlyn she got caught in the middle of a fight between a Saxon and whom she assumed to be a knight. He had blond hair that much she was sure of. A Saxon's sword found it's way into her upper thigh which caused her to hit the ground. Just two feet from her she could see Katlyn struggling against a Saxon who was ripping at her clothes. She struggled to her feet picking up a near by bow and arrow she aimed for the Saxon just before she felt the cool blade of a dagger at her throat she let go. Just as the blade pressed just enough to let a thin trickle of blood slide down into the front of her dress it as well as the Saxon pressing it to her throat was gone. She looked back to see who had saved her and saw a blond knight she met his eyes silently thanking him as she made her way to Katlyn. The two women embraced each other with relief.

"Are you all right?" the both asked as Beatrice came over to them

"Follow me I will get you both to safety." Beatrice said as she helped the two younger women up.

As Bryony stood up Katlyn went down. A strong hand rested on Bryony's shoulder as she turned she saw two pairs of eyes that she hadn't seen in a long time.

"Here let me help her." Lancelot said as he lifted Katlyn up into his arms.

"Do not think you can take advantage of her she's about to take her vows for the church." Beatrice warned firmly

"Beatrice I trust that man with my life believe me she's safe." Bryony said as she weakly smiled at Lancelot.

"You obviously do not know him very well to trust him with a virgin." Bors joked

"I've known him since I was five. I am well aware of his reputation, but I think he has better sense than to defile a woman of the cloth mainly since she is unconscious" she swayed and was caught by a pair of strong warm arms. She looked up into the eyes of the blond knight who had saved her before." Hi."

"Hi, yourself." he said just as she closed her eyes." Dagonet you're needed she's hurt bad."

"Gawain can we not take you one place where women are not swooning over you?" Galahad joked as Dagonet looked at Bryony's injuries.

"Patch her up quickly we need to get to Hadrian's Wall." Arthur insisted as he went over to the older woman." I am Arthur these are my knights. Lancelot is with the young girl named Katlyn. Gawain, Dagonet and Galahad is with Bryony. This is Tristan and that is Bors. We are here to help you are there anymore?"

"No, they've either been killed or ran away when they could." Beatrice informed them as her blue eyes met Arthur's

"I will take you three under my protection." Arthur told her as Gawain carried Bryony over to them.

"Do not worry too much about old Beatrice she is like a mother hen." Bryony smiled weakly at the older woman.

"She is in a bad way do you think she will make it far?" Beatrice questioned Dagonet softly

"She will make it to Hadrian's Wall." Dagonet said as he followed Gawain.

Beatrice reluctantly followed Arthur outside. _How long has it been since I've seen the light of day? _She wondered as she squinted her eyes against the harsh light of the sun. Lancelot was sitting with Katlyn cuddled against him. Gawain helped Bryony on his horse as he jumped on behind her. Beatrice closed her eyes as she sighed. _These girls are in for a world of hurt and trouble._ She thought as she felt herself being lifted onto Tristan's horse.


	2. More in common than war

_**Disclaimer: I still don't own anyone or thing in King Arthur.**_

**Chapter Two**

Bryony woke up to the sound of laughter and the feeling of a warm solid pillow. Her eyes fluttered open just a little and she saw blue sky. Her eyes fluttered back shut as she felt her pillow rumble with laughter. She snapped her eyes opened once again and tried to disentangle herself from the arms that held her in place.

"You're okay relax you will send us both falling to the ground." a man's voice behind her said as she stopped struggling long enough to see Lancelot.

"You sure have grown up a lot since the last time I saw you." He said to her as he smiled charmingly at her.

"Well, you know I've heard a lot about you just never thought you would have to resort to unconscious women to warm yourself with." Bryony teased as she felt the man behind her laugh.

"She does have a point there." the man said as she looked up at him

"I am sorry I do not think I got your name before I passed out in your arms." she smiled softly at him" my name's Bryony. That young lady Lancelot has is Katlyn. Beatrice is over there with the man with the Hawk. "Wow, it's beautiful." her eyes fell on Tristan's Hawk as it perched itself on his arm.

"I'm Gawain. The man you talk of is Tristan. The man that patched you up is Dagonet. The one over to my left is Galahad. The one behind Lancelot is Bors." He introduced them all to her

"I owe you a thanks for patching me up." Bryony said as she looked at Dagonet

"You can thank me once you are fully healed." Dagonet said" I will see to it that you get rest you need it."

"Wow, look at you barely know me and already so demanding." she smiled

"If you do not listen to him I will knock you out myself." Lancelot said to her as he gave her a wicked smile

"No, you can not I am about to take vows to the church." she laughed, but it hurt her ribs when she did.

"So?" he raised a brow at her

" So hitting me would be like hitting god himself." she said then laughed as she remembered who she was talking to.

"Then come closer so I can hit you now and dame myself forever." he joked as he laughed" When did you start believing in this god that Arthur believes in?"

"When I met Arthur." she said softly as she heard the surprise in his voice before she saw it in his eyes.

"You and Arthur know each other?" he questioned a little surprised he thought only he shared memories of her before now.

"Yes, I met him when I was fifteen of course I have not seen him since I was seventeen because that's when he left and I decided to take my vows. Though truth be told I have been in training since I was ten." she informed him softly as she leaned back into the warmth of the man behind her.

"Why did you chose that?" Lancelot asked as he saw her eyes fluttering" Do you not want to have a family some day?"

"Well, you left me when I was ten though it was not your choice. My mother was left by my father so we moved to Rome which was where I met Arthur and she pushed me into a convant. She was afraid I would lose my virture to a charming man who would only distroy not only my heart, but my reputation as well. Then Arthur left me when I was seventeen I was not about to let a third man leave me so I opted for the one being that would never leave me when I needed him the most." her words hit Arthur's heart who was riding silently with them." Now if I had been in love with either of you two I really would be bloody damned right now. " her eyes fluttered shut as she gave into the dark abyss calling out to her.

"You never told me that you knew her." Lancelot said to Arthur as he slowed down to ride next to him

"You never told me that _you_ knew her either." Arthur countered

"I guess it never came up because both of us thought only we knew her." Lancelot replied softly" I left before she grew up I'm glad she had you there for a while."

"Until I had to leave her as well." Arthur stated with a hint of sadness

Both men rode in silence as they each were left to their own thoughts about how or why they abandoned Bryony. Bryony on the other hand was nestled in the warmth of her fever that she had suddenly got. Her fevered state led to dreams that were as hot as herself. Gawain had to tighten his hold her sleeping form as she went limp. He was afraid that he would drop her before they made it to the wall.


	3. Confessions and Plotting

_**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or thing from King Arthur.**_

**Chapter Three**

A week later found Bryony up and about. She was avoiding Arthur who seemed to be like her shadow. He felt guilty about what had happened to her though he said nothing his told how he felt every time he looked at her. Tonight was a beautiful night and she wanted to explore the grounds without Arthur. She could hear men laughing as she got closer to the tavern. She was close enough to each knight that had been there to save her, Beatrice, and Katlyn when they were attacked. She still had nightmares about that horrible night. The one she recalled as Tristan and the other one called Gawain were throwing knives as she stood there she looked long and hard at each knight.

These were the famous Samaritan knights. Lancelot she knew from when she only a small child. The rest she did not know much about. As she watched them she saw not the knights that saved her life, but men. Men that had families people loved them and prayed they would come back to them. Lancelot's eyes met hers and for one moment she saw the boy she knew years ago. He grew into a very handsome and brave man. The shared a smile as she reluctantly walked over to him.

"Well, I thought Arthur would keep you locked up for the remainder of your life." Lancelot smirked as she smiled at him and threw her arms around his neck.

At the moment he opened his mouth she realized how much they had missed of each other's lives and she felt the need to just be held. She felt him pull her closer to him as she sat on his lap with her face buried in his shoulder.

"You're not going to cry are you?" Lancelot asked as she picked up her head and met his eyes.

"No, I think I'm done with the crying. I have missed you though I've had a full life since moving to Rome." she said as she stood back up." Arthur thinks I'm sleeping."

"What brings you here?" Gawain asked as he now noticed the woman that was beneath the hair covered face and bloodied leg. She was very appealing if he did say so his self.

"I needed air." she said shyly as she smiled at him when their eyes met.

"You still need your rest it has only been a week and you were hurt badly." Dagonet said to her in a concerned voice

"Yes, but I'm almost fully healed." she stated as he motioned for her to sit down in between him and Lancelot." I couldn't have stayed in bed another second without going mad." this got her looks from every knight around her which made her blush a little.

"Are you allowed to drink or is that forbidden along with being a woman?" Lancelot still a little miffed that the girl he once considered his closest friend chose to give up her faith to them Roman's faith.

"Well, not that it's really any of your concern since we have not seen each other in fifteen years, but I have not taken any vows yet therefore nothing is forbidden to me." she paused as she looked him right in his eye" And if by being a woman you mean getting married, having a family and such then I'm glad to give that up."

"What made you decided to dedicate your life to the church?" Galahad asked

"A Roman church at that." Lancelot narrowed his eyes at her.

"My mother was heart broken after my father died we moved to Rome with a friend of the bishop's. Her last words to me before she died of a fever was that she wanted me to be happy and she thought that the church could provide that for me." her eyes met Galahad's, but she could feel Lancelot's disapproving gaze still on her." It worked for a while, but now I'm not so sure it was the best decision."

"So, you abandoned your home. Your faith for one that your mother thought would make you happy and it didn't." Lancelot raised a brow at her as she narrowed her eyes at him.

"Well, with you gone and my father dead there was no home to stay in. As for as my faith I never forgot what I was taught I just thought it would be easier for me if I tried to see it from their point of view." she sighed as she dropped her gaze from his" You wouldn't understand because you weren't there." her voice was soft and thought Lancelot wanted to have a snappy remark he could tell she wasn't ready to argue with him so he let it go.

"The church is not working for you anymore?" Galahad questioned

"Lately it feels more like a burden than happiness." her voice held a sadness in it that really hit Lancelot and when she brought her yes up to his he was stunned to see the pain in their depths." I've been to Rome and it's a beautiful place." she was now on her feet pacing back and forth.

"But you're not happy." it wasn't a question it was a statement of fact and Lancelot was not going to let her stay were she did not want to.

"I was for a time. The last three years has been one thing or another. The first time I was to take my vows it was in Rome and a fight broke out in which the priest got his arm broken. Then in another church the woads attacked our Priest as he was on his way to me. Now it's the Saxons. This is the first time I had actually been injured. I could've died." she turned and her eyes met Gawain's." You saved my life thanks in case I didn't say it before."

"Don't think twice about it." Gawain said as he felt pity for the woman before him she truly did have a bout of bad luck.

"Sit your leg is not a healed as you think it is." Tristan spoke for the first time since she met him and it stunned her into obeying him as their eyes met.

"If you're so unhappy then don't take your vows." Bors said simply

"It's not that easy." she said softly

"Sure it is." Gawain said as his eyes met hers.

"The Bishop will be here in a few days to help me take my vows." she informed them

"What if you can't be there to take them?" Lancelot questioned

"The only good excuse would be if some how my vows would be compromised." she stated softly as she stood up to leave the men." I'm tired now so I'll see you in the morning

"Like if you fell in love or weren't so pure." Lancelot tossed out

"I could help you with the not being pure part after all I did save your life." Gawain chuckled as she just shook her head and left the men alone.


	4. Compromised Vows

**A/N: **_Sorry it's been a while, but I just found out I'm Pregnant with our second baby so things are running a little hectic now. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Thanks to those who put this story on alert. I know this one was really short, but it's like one of those filler chapters the next ones will be better._

_**Disclaimer: I still own nothing or no one from King Arthur**_

**Chapter Four**

"Come on Bryony the bishop will be here any second." Katlyn said as the girls hurried to meet the carriage. Bryony was wearing a long white dress that was buttoned up to her neck and a veil shielding her face from view. Katlyn who had already taken her vows was wearing a white dress with a veil that only hid from her nose down.

"I am not so sure about this." Bryony said softly as her heart pounded in her chest. She felt like she could not breath as the carriage got closer and she could see the bishop step out.

"Relax no one can hurt us here we are surrounded by Arthur and his knights." Katlyn said with a polite smile

"Are you feeling well child you look pale?" Beatrice asked concerned about Bryony's lack of enthusiasm.

"I am just worried since bad things happen everything I try to take my vows." she said not so sure she wanted to take her vows now.

"This time will be different you will take your vows and then we will live in god's house." Katlyn reminded her

Bryony only smiled weakly beneath the veil She felt trapped suddenly. _This must be what an animal who has been caught by a hunter feels like. _She thought sadly. She should be thrilled about this day. She has been planning this for a long time now it is what she wants... right? She thought she did at one time, but the fight with the Saxons really made her think about things. Then Lancelot being back in her life after all these years now she wasn't so sure.

She could Arthur greeting him and saw the knights as they stood proudly. She heard him greet each one and thank them for their bravery. She heard him say something to Beatrice and Katlyn. When he came to her she couldn't hear him over the drumming of her heart. She suddenly felt like she could not breath. All she could do was nod her head and hope he did not notice her falter. Suddenly the feeling of not being able to breath got the better of her and she passed out. Before the blackness took her over she heard Lancelot's voice though it sounded so far away.

"What's wrong with her?" the Bishop questioned as Lancelot made it to her side before she hit the ground. He scooped her up in his arms carrying away from the crowd.

"She's been through a lot." Beatrice stated thinking it was some lasting effect from their ordeal.

"Yes, she had a bad fever and was injured very badly during the attack by the Saxons" Katlyn said

"Will she be okay?" He asked concerned

"We will let you know." Katlyn said softly as Gawain passed by them

"She could just be pregnant." he mutter faking innocence as he heard the shocked gasps come from Katlyn and Beatrice. He them heard the Bishop's outraged in take of breath

"Why would you say something like that?" Katlyn asked shocked that he would try to ruin Bryony's reputation as well as her vows.

"It happens to women a lot I was just suggesting that it could've happened to her." He said with a shrug

"Are you suggesting that her vows have been compromised?" The bishop questioned seriously

"That depends by what you mean by compromise." Galahad tossed in as him and Gawain walked off together.

"Arthur what I just heard better not be true. Your knight there better not have touched that girl." the bishop huffed

"I assure you I will get to the bottom of this as soon as she is okay." Arthur sensing his knights were up to something went after them.


	5. Could You Marry Someone You Did Not Know

**A/N: **_Sorry its taken so long, but I sort got writer's block with this story. Now, I'm good. I hope you enjoy this chapter this story is coming to an end shortly though. Not a lot of people seem to be liking it so you know like with all other stories it will end soon._

_**Disclaimer: I still own nothing in KA**_

**Chapter Five**

Bryony could hear talking mostly yelling as she let her eyes flutter open. Her eyes met those of Lancelot's as he smiled down at her. She smiled weakly back at him.

"What happened?" she questioned her head still feeling lite.

"You fainted." He said flatly as the bishop came over to them

"Why did you not tell anyone what your plans were?" he asked as she looked at him confused

"I did not plan on fainting I assure you that" she stated firmly

"I was talking about your marriage plans." he said to her surprise

"What?" she questioned stunned

"Your vows have been compromised therefore you must get married to retched knight that dared to touch you." he stated sternly

"I-I have no idea what you are talking about." she said feeling like she was in some sort of odd dream.

"It is okay I told him everything." Gawain said as he moved closer to her side.

"Then you better fill me in on what you have said." she to him her eyes narrowing at him as he just smiled

"Only that he took advantage of you in a moment of weakness and now he has agreed to marry you." the bishop said to her

"I am sure that there must be some other way maybe if I promise to not ever do it again." she said the words sounding odd on her tongue _God no man had ever dared to touch me and here is this knight I do not know saying that he had just to get me out of my vows. I can not marry him though. We do not know each other let along love each other._

"I am sorry my child you can never get back what you have lost." he said as he turned to leave her along with Gawain.

"Are you insane?!" she yelled at him as she rubbed her head

"I was only trying to help you and the bishop just assumed that we..." he started, but she put up her hand

"Did you have a part in this as well?" she asked Lancelot.

"No, this was all Gawain." he said softly

"Someone want to tell me what is going on here?" Arthur questioned as he looked from Gawain to Bryony

"She does not want to become part of the church." Lancelot said

"That is not what I said." Bryony stated

"It is what you implied" Gawain said

"I never meant for this to happen." she said frustrated" I never asked for any of you to help me."

"You are a friend of Lancelot's and you needed help." Gawain defended his actions

"Help? You let the bishop believe that I... and I have never..." she could not even say the words.

"Do not worry I will take care of this you just concentrate on getting well enough to get married." Arthur stated as he turned and left taking Lancelot with him.

"You guys should have let me die in that church." Bryony groaned as she thought about the things that had happened to her.

"If I had done that then I would not have my friend here with me." Lancelot said as he sat next to her on the small bed.

"I will make this right." Gawain vowed as he looked over at the woman that everyone assumed was going to be his wife. He barly knew her. Could he marry a woman he did not love just to save her reputation? He pounded this thought as he left Lancelot with her.


	6. Talking and Sharing

**A/N: **_ I know it's been a while since I updated, but life's getting busy. I'm about to move out of this place and into another. So yeah it's been hectic. I hope you enjoy this chapter._

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one in KA.**_

**Chapter Six**

"How in the bloody hell did I get into this?" Bryony was so furstated as she walked through the garden.

It had been a week since the horrible mishap had happened. All she had to do was take some vows and this whole thing could have been avoided. She could not even do that because she had to open her mouth to make her confession about feeling like she needed more. She sighed heavily as she rubbed her head. She sat on a near by stone bench as she stared at a perfectly white rose. The only thing that marred it was a brown spot on a petal. It was at this moment that she realized if Gawain went through with marrying her she would no longer be pure. Could she give herself willing to a man she did not even know?

"Hey," a male voice said to her bringing her out of her thoughts she turned to see Arthur looking at her.

"I am in a big mess here." she gave a soft laugh as he sat next to her

"Well, actually Gawain is. He is the one who announced you were pregnant." he told her as he took in her expression

"Well, I appreciate his intention, but I assure you I am not in anyway pregnant. I have never... I just can not see myself married to the church." she paused as she thought about her words carefully." I voiced my concerns to your knights and well, this is my fault as well. You have very good knights with well meaning, but really he could have thought of another rout."

"I think he did not think of the consequences he just thought about you voicing your objection to the church and knowing that you were a close friend of someone who is like a brother to him he wanted to help you." Arthur said as she looked up at him.

"Did he have to say I was pregnant?" she smiled softly

"I admit that was a little much, but do not be to angry with him." Arthur said to her

"I am not angry at him at all." she said as she took a deep breath." I am more angry at myself."

"Well, the good news is no one else heard the announcement so therefore you nor Gawain have to make any choices you do not wish to make." He told her

"What about the bishop?" she questioned

"I will handle the bishop." he told her reassuringly

"Thank you Arthur." she said as they shared a warm hug" I have missed you very much."

"As I have you." he told her as they parted ways.

Bryony had been avoiding the knights Gawain inparticular. What do you say to the man that told the bishop you were carrying his child? Then he said you were getting married. _ What could she say to him? _ She wonder as she made her way back to her room in Arthur's castle. She was turning the corner when she bumped into a solid form. That solid form had blond hair and belonged to the very person she had been purposely avoiding. Their eyes met and for one second she forgot why she had been avoiding him.

"I wanted to apologies to you for ruining your reputation." He said to her as her eyes dropped from his.

"You were only trying to help. I am sure your intentions were not to cause any harm." she felt a feeling she had never felt when in the presence of a man before... she felt attracted to this knight before her. He was quite charming and very handsome.

"It was not my intention to cause you any type of harm or embarrassment. We can call it off if anyone ask we'll say I betrayed you." he said to her astonishment.

"There is no need to do any such thing. Arthur has assured me that no one except for those present even know what you said. So as far as they are concerned it never happened." she said to him as they continued down the hall.

"Then you have not heard." he said calmly as he waited for her anger.

"Heard what?" she questioned as she faced him

"Someone else overheard my little outburst and now the whole castle as well as some of the villagers are anticipating my marriage." he said to her as she closed her eyes and instead of getting angry she laughed." Are you alright?"

"Oh this is just lovely. I have not even had a proper kiss from a man, but because I did not want to spend my life in a church everyone now thinks I have given myself to a man. A man I have not known for very long. I suppose it could be a lot worse." she was in shock, but she would not fall apart in front of him.

"You have never been with a man n anyway have you?" Gawain suddenly realized how rare of a woman she was. He had met many virgins, but no one that knew Lancelot and were as comfortable around men as she was.

"Well not that it is any of your business, but no." she said as she felt her cheeks burn a little

"Perhaps I can be the first to give you a proper kiss." he smiled at her not really meaning what he said at least that was what he was going to tell her.

"I only know your name." she said to him as she suddenly thought about what his lips must feel like.

"That is more than most women." he said then cursed his words as her smile faded from her face and she turned to go toward her room.

"Then maybe you should go find them because I am not interested in being another nameless woman who has the misfortune of gracing your bed." she spat out at him as she opened her door to go into the safe haven she called her room, but his hand around her elbow.

"You may not want to be in my bed, but believe it is not their misfortune to be in my bed." he said then let go of elbow as she turned and slammed her door behind her.


	7. A Conversation Between Friends

**A/N: **_ I know it's been forever since I last updated, but I've been VERY busy with real life so to speak. Today was one of those days that I felt great so therefore my creative streak came back. I hope you all enjoy this chapter I might have a few more up just depends. There's only three more chapters left to this so I'm going to try to get them up as quickly as possible. I want them to be the really great chapters so that they don't seem to rushed._

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing nor no one in KA.**_

**Chapter Seven**

Today was one of those rare warm beautiful days. Bryony found herself settling in quite nicely. Katlyn and Beatrice left some time ago. There was nothing for Bryony to go back to. For the first in her entire life she felt like a weight had been lift from her shoulders. Gawain had actually set her free in a way. On the other hand he had also made it impossible for her to live a quite life. Everyone had heard about their upcoming 'marriage' and though the knights and Arthur knew that it was not real by the months end a wedding would take place.

Bryony frowned. Both she and Gawain tried their hardest to get out of it even staging some dumb fight, but in order for Bryony's reputation to stay intact she would have to marry the man everyone thought had taken her virginity. Who knew that a small private thing such as losing ones virginity would become known to the whole world? The truth was she had not lost her virginity. She was still very much so a virgin. She had no idea how to be a wife to a man like Gawain or to any man for that matter. Since every female thought she had already soiled herself there would be no talk of how to please her husband. She was truly afraid to be alone with him.

"You look like you are a million miles away from here." a familiar voice said to her bringing her out of her thoughts and back to the reality of her life.

She looked up from her where she sat in the garden to see Lancelot staring back at her. She smiled as he sat next to her.

"I wish I were, but a million miles away from here and this horrid mess that is now my life." she averted her eyes from his and pretended to examine a rose that had been obviously cared for well. For it was a luscious shade of red and nearly fully bloomed.

"Gawain is not that bad of a person." Lancelot offered trying to ease her worries." He would never expect you to do anything you are not willing to do." he caught her sidewards glance and soft blush at his meaning in his words." Has your mother ever spoken to you about things that go on between a man and a woman once they are married?" he did not want to have this type of conversation with her, but if she had no one else he would step in if only to ease her mind a little.

"I am not having _this _ conversation with you or any other man for that matter." she turned to face him her cheeks now painted a bright scarlet color. She would have laughed had this not involved her directly. Lancelot of all people trying to talk to her about what goes on between a husband and a wife.

"It would probably help you out more if you understood what to expect." he said as he cleared his throat.

"This is not a proper subject for us to talk about." she refused his kind gesture of help

"Well honestly all things considered what more could it hurt?" he said without thinking of his words until they left his lips." I am sorry that was very rude of me, but you have to understand I was only trying to help." he saw they way the blush left her cheeks and tears filled her eyes, but she refused to let them fall as she smiled up at him gently.

"I know and I appreciate it really I do it is just that I am not comfortable talking about this thing with you." she told him in the only way she could.

"Well, if you need someone to talk to there is no one who knows more about this than I." he sounded proud as he saw her smile brighten a little

"I will keep that in mind thank you." she had to smile at his outrageous bust of pride. Only Lancelot would be proud about how much he knew about sex.

"Have you thought about what you want to wear?" he questioned

"I have a white dress that I could wear though it is not a wedding dress." she met his eyes as she took his hand in hers." I would like you to give me away since obviously my father would not be here."

"I would be honored to." he said as he looked at her.

"Do you think Arthur could stand up with you since you two are the only family I have?" she questioned as they got up to walk through the path leading out of the garden.

"Yes, I think he would." he said feeling a connection to her again. She had turned out to be this beautiful woman and a part of him was jealous that Gawain would get her hand in marriage, but another part of him knew that he had nothing to offer her.

"I never thought I would be marrying someone I did not love let alone know." she confessed softly

"I never thought Gawain would settled down with any woman unless she was sarmation." he said to her

"Well, then both of us are nearly on the same page." she told him as they reached the castle doors.

"Try not to worry too much it is like I have said Gawain would never force you to do anything you were not ready for." he reassured her again

"I will have to remember that. Are you coming in?" she asked as she saw that he did not walk up to the door, but paused three feet from her.

"No, I have to go, but I will see you again." he said as he tilted his head to her and left.

She watched him for a while then she went inside the safety of he castle. How had she not noticed how beautiful Lancelot had become until now? She smiled ad shook her head. She should not think about another man when she was about to marry. She sighed heavily as she made her way to her room. She needed a nap. Perhaps she could clear her mind enough to think straight. As she laid down on the huge soft bed her thoughts went to Gawain and she wondered what their wedding night would be like.


	8. Bella is beauty

**A/N:**_ I know it's been forever since I last updated, but I ran into a bit of writer's block. Now It's gone so while I have the urge to I'm going to finish this story. Sorry it took so long. Anyhow hope you all like the next three chapters because they are it for this story._

_**Disclaimer: No I still don't own anything or one in KA.**_

**Chapter Eight**

Gawain was in the stables brushing his horse something normally he let the stablemen do, but today he felt like being close to his horse. At least it was one girl that did not hate him. He wondered how this all came to be something bigger than he anticipated. All he really wanted was to help Bryony out, but all he ended up doing was making things worse for her as well as his self. Now he had to marry her which he knew she did not want to do nor did he. He tried to think of anyway he could to get out of this, but in the end there was no way unless he wanted to sully her reputation. _Too late I have done that already._ He thought as he heard a noise behind him.

"Uh, we need to talk." Bryony's soft voice said from her place in the doorway

Gawain turned around and was greeted by the sight of a deep blue dress, soft curls piled high and soft creamy skin that just barely peaked out.

"Look, I do not want to fight with you anymore. What's done is done." he said to her as he cleared his throat.

"Nor do I with you." she said. She'd had a lot of time to think about her current situation and face the facts.

"I know you do not wish to be married to me and believe me you are not the woman I wanted to marry, but we are getting married and it is best if we at least get along in public." he suggested and he could almost swear he saw a glint of disappointment at his comment about her not being the woman he wanted to marry.

"I think you are right." she told him the sting of his words still hurt. What did she expect that somehow he would magically fall in love with her. After all what did they really know about each other aside from the obvious?

"Now that, that's settled do you want to help me clean her up or do you have something more important to do?" he questioned as he saw her look at the horse in awe.

"She is beautiful." she loved horses." Have you had her long?" she moved to stand by his side as she stroked the animals neck.

"Well, about a day and a night." he said to her with a smile

"So, you have not named her?" Bryony asked as her eyes met his and she was struck by the depth of emotion that lay in them.

"No, I have not." he said as he watched her soft creamy hand brush the sleek black coat of the mare.

"I am sure whatever name you come up with will fit her perfectly." she said to him as she moved her hand away from the horse to reach down and get the wet soapy cloth that sat in the bucket.

"She seems to like you a lot you should name her." he suggested as his hand met hers in the water.

"Yeah?" she sounded a little uncertain as she felt her cheeks blush at the skin to skin contact.

"Yeah." he said as he gave her one of those boyish smiles

"I think it should be Bella." she smiled brightly as she said it.

"Why that name?" he questioned as he saw the thoughtful look in her eye just before she said the name.

"My mom use to say that something beautiful should have the name Bella." her voice dropped a note as she spoke of the memory

"I am surprised she did not give you such a name." he said to her as she lifted the wet rag up to Bella's coat and began to gently rub it over her coat.

"Yeah she gave the name to my oldest sister who died at birth." she admitted softly

"Then it is an honor that you gave it to her. It suits her well." he said to her noting the slight sad edge to her tone.

"Yes, it does." she smiled as they washed Bella's coat together.

After they had Bella all cleaned Gawain emptied the bucket of water as Bryony waited for him.

"Would you like to accompany me to the tavern for a drink and maybe get some food?" he offered her as he held out her hand to him

"I would like that." she agreed as she put her hand in his.

They had reached a moment where both knew they would forever be apart of each other's lives for however long they were meant to.


	9. To keep a husband coming back

_**Disclaimer: I still own nada in KA**_

**Chapter Nine**

In the weeks that lead up to now Bryony found herself growing more and more fond of Gawain. He had managed to get past all of her defenses and somehow found his way to her heart. He was a knight for Arthur and he would always risk his life for him. It was bad enough that Lancelot and Arthur's lives were in constant danger, but now to add another life that would soon be joined with hers was almost too much for her. She had a lot to ponded as she went about her everyday routine of getting dressed in the morning. She had just gotten out of her bath and was brushing her hair that was still wet. She was in a dressing gown as she shuffled through her clothing. Why did she suddenly have trouble finding something to wear now when it never bothered her before?

She sighed heavily as she realized what was happening. She was falling for a man. Not just any man. She was falling for Gawain. The man that was going to be her husband . It made since now. Her bubbly feelings when she woke up this morning. The need to smell and look great.

She picked up the only white dress she had. As she began to put it on she could not help the smile that seemed to be permanently attached to her face. She was going to be married today. It was beautiful. As she looked at it she realized something she had not before. Right above the breast was a white rose and red rose. She remembered her mother saying that this dress was a symbol of pure love. It was not even a wedding dress, but somehow her mom knew she was going to wear this dress one this day.

"Hey, you need some help?" Venora questioned as she softly knocked on the closed door.

"You can come in." she said happy that at least someone was here to help her that was not a man.

"You look beautiful." Venora said as she smiled at the other woman.

"Thank you could you help me with my hair though?" she asked as she turned around

"Do you want it up or down?" Venora asked softly

"Up." she said

As Venora piled her hair up on top of her head in a beautiful arrangement Bryony had time to think about her life. It was odd how she went from and little girl so scared of men to this point. It was now that she was very nervous about tonight. _What if I am not what he wants? What if I lack in the area he does not? How could I possibly be good enough to keep him coming back? _All these thoughts plagued her mind as Venora finished with her hair. She turned around to face the other woman and smiled.

"Gawain is not going to know what to do once he sees you." Venora said as she smiled encouragingly at Bryony.

"I am afraid it is I who will not know what to do with him." she blushed as she walked toward the window

"I am sure you will." Venora said wondering why if she and Gawain were expecting a child would she say such a thing.

"No, you see he lied." she stared blankly out into the green grass

"About what?" Venora asked as she watched the girl

"About my vows being compromised." she spoke softly as she felt her cheeks burn" You see we never... I have never... Oh bloody hell why is this so hard to say?"

"Are you saying that you are a virgin?" Venora questioned as Bryony turned around

"Yes, I am." she confessed as her brows creased together.

"I see." Venora said to her

"You do not see. I am afraid I will not be able to please him in the one place a woman should be able to please her husband." she confessed her fears to Venora" I have only known the life of a nun. Until the Saxon's attack I had no contact with men except for the bishop , but even that was nothing more than him coming to check on us."

"Does Gawain know this?" Venora asked curiously

"Yes, he does. He said all he did because he thought he was helping me out of my vows. I have been doubting my path. I thought there was more out there for me besides the church and well, Gawain said what he did to help get me out of them. Now here we are." she felt like a heavy weight had been lifted off her shoulders

"Yes, here we are." Venora said a little taken back by the confession, but knowing Bryony needed help

"So, could you skip the details and just tell me how to keep a man like Gawain pleased enough to want to come back." she felt so uncertain about all of this.

"Well, believe men will always come back if they feel they are wanted and needed. Keeping a man's interest is hard. You have to make them think there is always more. Gawain already thinks there is something in you that is special because he has gone this far for you." Venora said to her" No other woman has gotten him to go this far."

"Thank you for saying that." she said to her" I wish my mother could have been here for this."

"I am sure she is watching from her place in heaven. Just relax you are going to be fine." Venora said to her as she handed her some white flowers

Bryony took a deep breath as she followed Venora out the door. She was going to marry the man she never thought would come along. Once again the smile from before was on her lips and the butterflies were in her stomach. Her legs felt wobbly as she got closer to the crowd of people and...Gawain. This was it. There was no turning back. She did not want to. Gawain turned to her ad smiled as she stood by him and placed her hand in the bend of his elbow.


	10. Rose Petal Baths and long overdue lovema

**A/N: **_This is the last chapter I do hope you guys enjoy it. I had planned more for this story, but with the writer's block and being pregnant I thought it would be better to end it here in this beautiful way._

_**Disclaimer: I still own nada in KA**_

**Chapter Ten**

Getting married was not as hard as they thought it would be. Bryony sat next to Gawain at a table full of the most delicious smelling foods and ale or wine which ever you preferred. Arthur went all out for Bryony and Gawain. She was now a married woman and all she had to do was keep in mind what Venora had said to her earlier. As she took a roll from her plate and began to eat she felt Gawain's hand on her thigh. Her initial reaction was to swat his hand away, but she reminded herself that he was her husband now and so he had every right to touch wherever he liked. She glanced over at him and his smiled sent a wave of pleasure down her spine. What woman wouldn't melt at the sight of this man?

"I have but a small speech to say." Lancelot stood up and grabbed everyone's attention

"Careful what you say women and children are present." Venora warned him as everyone laughed

"I will keep that in mind." he said as she smiled at her" Gawain you are a lucky man the last time I saw the beautiful woman sitting next you she barely reached my shoulder. If you were any other man man I would have a problem, but knowing you for as long as I have I know no harm will come to her." He smiled at Bryony who returned his smile" Besides I know she can kick your ass if you even thought of hurting her." At this everyone laughed again.

"I would gladly let her." Gawain said as he took her hand in his and brought it to his lips to place a soft kiss on it.

Bryony smiled and felt her cheeks burn a little. She dipped her chin down as her eyes met Gawain's.

After some time it started to get dusk. Bryony excused her self away from everyone as she made her way to where Gawain had been staying. She wondered if that would be where they would stay or if he would move to Arthur's? When she opened the door she saw a small tub full of water and rose petals waiting just inside the small room. She paused in the doorway confused as to who could have done such a sweet thing. Probably_ Venora since she was the only female who knew the truth behind her marriage. _She thought as someone cleared their throat. She turned around to see Gawain behind her.

"You did this?" she was surprised that he had the time let alone the knowledge to do something so completely sweet.

"I thought it could be a start to the long apology that you deserve from me." he said softly as he placed his hand on her cheek

"I was there too. I could have at any moment said something, but I did not." she confessed softly as she felt a pang of displeasure seep in. _Was he still against their being married? _He wondered

"I was the one who started this whole thing so I understand your not wanting to be married to me." he said as he saw her eyes drop down

"At first I was against this whole thing..." she started, but stopped as she realized she was not sure why she was not still against this.

"Now." he pressed needing to hear her say that she felt something for him, maybe the same thing he felt for her.

"I could not imagine being with anyone else. You somehow got inside my heart." she confessed as she brought her eyes up to meet his.

Gawain did not know what to say to her. He just wrapped her in his arms and kissed her with all the passion he held inside. It was not until the door shut behind him that he realized they were now standing inside. He pulled away from her and grabbed her hand. He lead her to the tub of water and rose petals. As they stood beside the tub surrounded in candle light he turned her around and reached for the tiny ribbon that held her dress together. He felt her shiver as he gently slid her dress off her shoulders kissing each newly exposed patch of skin. AS the dress dropped to pool around her feet he turned her to face him as he took in the beautiful sight of his wife naked before him as no other man had ever seen.

Bryony was swept up in the excitement of being alone with Gawain. She barely noticed he removed her dress. Oh she was aware of being naked before him when their eyes met and she saw his cloud over. Between the smell of the roses and the light of the candles flickering around them she felt like the most beautiful woman in the world. It suddenly did not matter that she was a virgin because when she met his eyes she was the woman he married. She smiled at him as he leaned down and scooped her up in his arms placing her gently in the warm water. Once she was in the water he only touched her skin to wash her with scented water. She felt his hands brush against her the undersides of her breast as he finished washing her skin.

After he was done she looked at him her eyes locked with his as she stood up letting the water and petals slid over her skin. Some of the petals stuck to her skin which she did not care. Gawain reached up and took her face in his hands as he kissed her softly. He lifted her out of the water and carried her to the bed on the far side of the room. He kissed her lips then trailed down to her breast taking the nipples in his mouth. He kissed the plains of her stomach stopping shortly before he reached her woman hood. He stood up and quickly shed his own clothing before he joined her back on the bed again. He took his time in loving her body until he knew she was ready for him.

When he finally made her his wife in every since of the word she felt a slight pain, but it quickly faded as his lips found her breast once gain. Maybe things did not go the way they should have for a normal couple who loved each other, but for them this was the best way. Married first then fall in love. They never mentioned the word love, but it is what they felt even if neither one said it to the other. Love did not have to be said to be expressed. There was other ways and they had found their way to express it to each other. Words were not enough at moments like this. Action spoke volumes and said a lot more than their words every could.


End file.
